Alone does not mean lonely

First, lets have some definitions about the words themselves.

Alone - having no one else present, on one´s own
Lonely - sad because one has no friends or company, without companions, solitary
(from http://oxforddictionaries.com/)

All of us felt both of this emotions - but why sometimes Alone stands for Lonely?
Is it inevitable? Is it us who let this feelings to come on our surface?
Or is it a pressure from society that people need to be in groups?
Can you be alone and happy at the same time? Forever?

運命をあきらめずに時間を壊して

One of my most beloved songs from Luna Sea - Providence.
Of course when I first fell in love with this beauty I could not understand one word!
(well, not even the English ones, at least not properly)
But the music is magical and compelling and mystical <3
(And I love this era of j-rock/visual kei - and Sugizo is such a drama queen :D )

The other thing is that my weak spot is violins - they just sound too good to be truth!
And yesterday I saw some photo from the year 2011 ... When X had been in Berlin on the World tour.
It all came back ... X Japan are a good band, but my reasons why I was there were totally different ...
I wanted to see Sugizo playing the violin! :) (really stupid reason, I know - and I know lots of j-rock fans would like to kill me for being there and not even knowing all of the X Japan songs ... sorry guys :D )

So, here it comes - enjoy the spooky sounds! <3
(be prepared - long horror-like intro :) )

Women philosophers?

I am attending a group of philosophy in Liverpool.
It is lots of fun and you can meet tremendously interesting people. At least I had. :)
Topics vary from "Future of genetics and the moral impact on society" thru "Authority and its concept" to "Are we living in a multiverse?". Everyone can find something of their own concern. I love it all.
Another good point is that most of the people are not a real "philosophers".
They are usually clever in a different, usually scientific, way and discussions can get even more edgy.
Overall it is a brain training.

And for me it is a great pleasure because I love to listen to a proper English. xD
Of course it is a way to meet new people and possibly make some friends. Plus get smarter.

We have a meeting tomorrow and the topic is "Why there are so few of women philosophers?"
This article will show my views on this problem and I would love you to engage in comments if you have some thought and a minute to spare. :)

So, lets do it!

When to love is not an option

First of all, I would like to apologize for not writing anything for such a long period of time.
I was not really busy or anything, I was just lazy as usual.
That is why I have to say sorry and be ashamed of myself xD

Today, it will be mostly just about my problems and bla bla bla but I am sure that some of you will be able to relate their stories as well.
Almost everyone was in love - at least once in their lifetime.
Some of us all in love all the time - usually platonic.
There are always this beautiful platonic loves you are not even trying to work out just because you know they can not be real - for example "loving" an older japanese guy that is married?!
You can always look at them and admire, sometimes blush when you talk to them, but if you have something called conscience and brain you won´t try to kiss them :D (you do not want to make a fool of yourself after all, or do you?! )
But then there are times when it is too hard to prevent yourself from falling for someone.
And sometimes it can be too deep to get easily back on your feet.

Mary Katrantzou

Ok, I am not really good at "fashion history" but I can tell what I like - and this is all :)
So, in fashion-related posts I will just expressing mine own taste and statements. Nothing less - nothing more.

When I saw this prints/shapes/dresses I fell in love instantly! <3
It is like wearing ART! Plus for me it looks kinda asian-like so I love it just more and more!
Shapes are weird and original - it gives it even more unique look.

So, here are some of the breath-taking clothes from surely talented Mary Katrantzou!

This dress is my favourite - combines nice but a little bit haunted print with comfy fabric.

Thumb up! <3

It can be monochrome to give you more chills!

Who would have thought about shape like this? <3

This one strikes me the most with asian feeling.

And these ones you can already buy - but be prepared for a really "nice" price.

Well, you have to pay extra for art and style in one.

Termini of infinity

We are living on a planet that is somewhere called Universe - at least we think so but who can be sure.
And this place is supposed to be really big - some says it is so huge it has no end.
But is not this a really hard concept for our brain to absorb?
On the other hand, can you imagine that there would be some end of our Universe?
What would be on the other sideof this end? If nothing, how does this nothingness look?

Lets talk about this issue and practise our little grey cells, shall we?

Second bottle of H2O2

I think this is the second and the last post from my University - after that things stopped being funny xD

But I was always interested in science and technology, so I am sure there will be more posts on this topic.

It probably just won´t be funny xD

So, here we go - enjoy the last bits :)

"Nowadays, it is not such fun - you can not drink ammonia by the chance now."

Despair and faith

Tomorrow is unclear
so I´ve got stuck in yesterday
still thinking about my faults
feeling the unchanging fate

Rain falls like a big brother
of my own bitter tears
storm that continues in my heart
can not be satisfied

I can not see the Suns rays
through the darkness
that surrounds me
as a silky but heavy smog

Going from nowhere to nowhere
filled with own guild
filled with the heartbreaking pain

Just how long
can I stay like this?
How long before I am going to
fall on the ground of reality?

the sun of happiness can burn me into the ash ...

But I still want to touch
this warm light instead of this
cold hands of distressed being

Maybe that is just a call
of helpless and hopeless soul
maybe that is just a death wish
to vanish into nothingness

Who would care about this
broken heart that can not see
nothing more than just
a true despair?

It is already decided
there is no tomorrow left
for me, or maybe
even for you

wishes fell from the sky
to get dirty while
touching the weak and filthy
mind of the human kind

They´ve gotten twisted
turned into sins and insanity
the pure essence was destroyed
made into nightmare

Fear overcomes the innocent
soul of a naive man
turning him into a killing machine

can not stop
can not change the reverse side of life ...

Still wishing
but without hope
still praying to be saved
just crumble in a corner
hiding from the true

Nothing can be the same
as a day before
it can evolve or die

Nothing between yesterday
and tomorrow

makes no life ...

Open mouth in a voiceless scream

heart closed for ever ...

You do not need to tell me that the structure is rubbish - I really know it, believe me xD

This is one of the old ones as well - I used to be really different. Now, I do not care so much as before. xD

But still, I quite like some parts of this one and I hope you will find something for yourselves as well.

Even after this time

Please, get out of my mind
sweet memories still remain
even after this time ...

You are in my dreams, every day
sweet reunion that always has
to end in bitter tears
even after this time ...

Please, let me forget that
once I belonged to somebody
let me forget that I loved
let me forget you
after this time ...

Loneliness is the only emotion
on my way to nowhere
Let me erase your smile
which hunts me every night
even after this time ...

Please, sweet nothingness
lets eat me alive, now
End my life, full of sorrow
End it after this time

For now and for ever ...

Ehm, just to let you know - this is something I wrote ages ago.
I still like it, it is full of hopeless emotions. But I would like to point out that I am not a weak person.
Just sometimes, when you feel blue, it is better to write it out and let it go.
So, although it might seem pretty depressed I just want to asure you I am not an emotionaly weak person.

It is just that sorrow makes you more creative :D
and then, when you´ve finished you feel happy and hyper again :)

Murasaki no Musouka

Hello everyone - I hope you enjoyed your day - and that you are still enjoying it now :)
The heading says it all - Murasaki no Musouka is my nickname that I usually use for artistic stuff.
You can find me on DeviantART if you like to and from time to time I would like to share some of my art with you. So, lets post something special to me - just for you ;)

This is saint Vitus cathedral in Prague.

I loved living in this city!

It does not matter where you get off the public transport - there is always something beautiful and historical surrounding you <3

And I would dare to say that there is something special, almost magical, about this cathedral!

If you will have some bussiness in Prague surely pay a visit to this breath-taking place!

I am sure you will love it as much as I did.

Whenever I had a spare time between classes I always went there - just to sit and relax.

If you can chose when to go go there when is sun going down.

It is just magical! <3

H2O2

I have known for quite a long time that I will publish the short comments from the University I used to attend.
And todays´ dream made me realize that this is probably the best time - not like there is anything like a good time for posting your quick notes on the web! :D

I always wanted to be a scientist so when I had to chose which university I want to go for I did not use my brain and went for a chemistry one - without almost any knowledge at all - How stupid have I used to be?
(and probably I am still the same ...)
But well I wanted to change the world so I decided for alternative sources of energy. Getting there was not a problem - I always was a nerdy one with a brain.
But staying there with my attitude that learning is just for losers was harder - and at the end impossible :D
Anyway, I enjoyed what I could and wrote down everything that sounded funny/nice/interesting.

So, get your brains started - here it comes!

Miyavi - Selfish love

Big part of my life is music. And when I say big I mean immense!
Every once in a while I would like to share my taste with you.
Sometimes you might like it - sometimes you might not.
But I will always post what I find to be nice and original in its own way.

First, I do not know way, is Selfish love by Japanese musician Miyavi.
I really do not like this guy - there is something about him that makes me think he is arrogant. Probably the fact that he is but nevermind ...
Miyavi is a very skilled guitar player and his way is unique.
I do not adore his singing but it makes it even more specific.
So, lets cut this here and enjoy some nice music now :)

(he is just brilliant! )

the Mortal instruments

I am a big fan of movies but quite a hard nut to satisfy.
So other things I would like to write about are movies.
Lets get this started now with the last one I saw recently. :)

The story is based around this mundane girl Clary. (Mundane means something normal/typical for this world)
She is nor really trubled, having a normal life of a teenager. Hanging around with her friends, rebelling against her mother, staying out late. Clary is a good artist - probably some genes she inherited from her mum - and her drawings are partly scary and like from fantasy world with all the magical creatures you have heard about when you were a kid. Then she starts to draw this weird sign (actually a rune) and everything turns over 360 degrees. Seeing this sign on one gothic/electro pub neon light she decides to take her friend Simon in and see for herself what this club is all about. Waiting for Simon to come back with drinks she witnesses how a group of three people kill one visitor. She screams but everyone is looking at her like she must be crazy because nobody can see what she does.

OK, I must admit that it all sounds familiar.
One person that can see things that noone else can. Of course they will try to contact her and find out where they did a mistake. It is cliche in many parts, but if you like fantasy it is a really good movie for you - if you close your eyes in parts that are "too romantic" and will forgive when the cast is a little bit dull. Still, it is not as dull as Twillight. The world is detailed and painted like a scary but still cool place to be. Clary who is played by Lily Collins is a really pretty girl and she will be wearing a sexy short skirt. It is not like the whole movie is just about that at all - but it is a nice plus to have beautiful actors in it. Jace is a badass demon hunter with a face of an angel. So, both genders have something to look at. :)

I personally wanted to run away at some points when the story was totally predictable or when it was too sweet but I did not.
The world - yep, I am gonna say it again - is amazing.
The movie made me read their book version.
The Mortal instruments - city of bones deserves 3 and a half stars from 5 :)
It could be better but lets wait for the second movie.

The new start! :)

Hello everyone :)

I love starting over and over again - when you make a mistake and you get up on your feet again. 
So, this is not my first blog but I usually am pretty lazy to make it work as it should.
Lets see how it will be with this one - want to change my attitude and work harder on it.

Something about me - I am a total dreamer that tries to make things happen.
Currently living in the United Kingdom of Great Britain - it is a really nice place, everyone - you should visit it at least once in a life time.
I tried to make my dreams come true many times - always failed - but I am not giving up yet :)
Art is the biggest passion for me in all of its forms - from paintings thru writing to nature around.
Always finding something great and beautiful in everyone/everything.

Japan is my dream country - can not say that I love it because I have never been there before.
But from what I know I want to go there and see for myself, how the life is lived there.
Hoping to win a millions cause who would like to work for Japanese people :D
(too hardworking and mainly they do not like "white-people" so much in their work places ...)
Still trying to learn Japanese because it is such a lovely language that you have to try it :)

Right now I am in a phase when I do not know what to do next.
What dream to pursue ... seriously when you love too much stuff you can not chose and you are just losing your precious time :)

In this blog I will write about everything and am willing to answer some of your questions.
Maybe not all of them - sometimes I can not know the answers :D 

So, this is the end for now :)

See you soon, guys :3

PS: this is me :D